Baseball

Since my two favorite teams are the Boston Red Sox and Whoever is Playing the Yankees, I must say: Go Phillies!

Let’s Go, Red Sox!

Yours truly sounding the battle-cry for the 2009 baseball playoffs, Israeli-style. I had just bought my first shofar in Jerusalem.

Baseball from Israel

RISHON LEZION, Israel — On my first trip to Israel three years ago, I was leaving the Holocaust Memorial when a passerby in the parking lot yelled out, “Go Yankees!”

I was wearing my Red Sox hat at the time. It seems that the Greatest Rivalry in All of Sports follows you anywhere, even ten thousand miles away from the East Coast and outside the somber remembrance of the greatest massacre in human history.

[Conversely, the opposite happened when I was traveling in Egypt. Near the Sphinx, I saw a guy wearing a Yankees hat, and I yelled, "Go Red Sox!" He gave me a puzzled look. "Not American?" I asked. "Uh, no," he replied in a German accent. "Never mind," I replied. Evidently, he was one of those foreigners who wears a Yankees hat only because the team is supposedly synonymous with the United States. Talk about good branding.]

The baseball playoffs are occuring this month, and the Red Sox and Yankees have clinched the AL Wild Card and AL East respectively. But the games will be difficult to watch — night ones start between 1 a.m. and 4 a.m. here. Still, I will be excited to see the Red Sox beat the Angels (as they always do in the playoffs) and then face the Evil Empire. But I will need a lot of קפה.

Baseball

RISHON LEZION, Israel — In the divisive world of the Middle East, there is one thing on which all Israelis agree: baseball is boring. Keith Burgess-Jackson has a solution that I did not even know existed: Enforce the tweve-second rule.

Live Sports

Rick Reilly posts the top ten sporting events that people should see in person. I’ve seen the Boston Red Sox play at Fenway Park (though not against the New York Yankees) during the nine years that I lived in Boston, and I went to Wimbledon when I lived in London in 2001. But I have yet to see the rest.

Still, I am skeptical of some of his choices. Golf, at least to me, is boring enough on television. Is it any better live? And how can Reilly not include the World Cup? International soccer is essentially warfare by other means.

Beautiful

If you want your yard to look like a baseball field, look at this. Sometimes I wish I did not live in a desert right now.

Curt Schilling

While announcing his retirement, the Red Sox pitching ace said he has “zero regrets.” Nor should he. In the nine years that I lived in Boston, he was my favorite player. I am sure that many current and former Bostonians would agree. Hopefully, Schilling will continue to blog.

Karaoke Rage

Salon uncovers a new alleged “rage” that is supposedly pervasive in many cultures:

In August 2007, a Seattle man was assaulted onstage during a karaoke rendition of Coldplay’s “Yellow,” while last December, a San Diego man encored his karaoke set by walking toward the crowd and attacking an audience member. And in Asia, there’s been a string of karaoke-bar stabbings and shootings, including a horrific incident in Bangkok in which eight amateur singers were murdered by their neighbor, reportedly due in part to his hatred of John Denver’s “Country Roads…”

One explanation for this uptick in karaoke rage is that karaoke bars bring together several socially combustible elements. Fill a room with 30 or so exhibitionists, ply them with alcohol and wireless microphones, and it’s only a matter of time before all the forced interaction results in conflict.

I have never witnessed any “karaoke rage,” but I think I came close once while I was celebrating my twenty-fourth birthday at a Japanese-themed karaoke club in Boston. After drinking more than my fair share of sake, I decided to sing “Sweet Caroline” by Neil Diamond — but with a twist in honor of the ongoing playoff series between the Boston Red Sox and New York Yankees. I told everyone to substitute “Yank-ees suck!” in place of the “Bum-bum-bum!” that everyone traditionally yells following “Sweet Caroline” in the refrain.

Everyone seemed to enjoy the performance (as much as I can recall), but I did not know that there was a Yankees fan from New York in the audience who was wearing a T-shirt in support of the Evil Empire. A few songs later, he went on stage to perform some angry rap song by an artist I did not know. In the middle of the song, he started shouting and cursing the people who were sitting at my table — my friends, myself, and two random eighteen-year-old girls in Red Sox shirts. I do not remember what he said, but I was so angry that I started to stand up. My friends rushed over, and convinced me to sit down. Everyone in the bar watched in shock at what the guy was doing, and soon his significant other got him off the stage and out of the bar. (I was still angry, so when I sang the last song of the night, I did “Smells Like Teen Spirit” by Nirvana — and afterwards I was unable to speak until the following morning as a result of the shouting.)

If “karaoke rage” does, in fact, exist, I think it is a result of the fact that music touches something special and spiritual deep inside each person. For example, witness any debate between two friends over which person’s favorite band is better. It is impossible to quantify something that is completely subjective, but everyone is usually convinced that he truly knows what is the best type of music and the best artist in that genre. When someone insults a person’s favorite band, he is insulting something deep inside the person himself.

Obama Secures Victory

ST. LOUIS, Missouri — Barack Obama’s infomercial last night (above) will secure him victory in the presidential race. However, it was not because its specific content was anything particularly special or original – Obama has said the same rhetoric throughout the presidential campaign. Rather, it was a masterpiece of television production.

As David Brooks once wrote, voters generally tend to choose candidates based on emotion and then justify their selections in rational terms later. Obama’s candidacy has mastered the appeal to emotion, and the infomercial was a perfect example of this strategy. Television is inherently a superficial medium (any comparison of broadcast to print news reveals this fact), but it is excellent at conveying emotion. In this case, the medium is the message. Obama, just like John F. Kennedy and Ronald Reagan, is a candidate perfectly suited for television.

I watched the infomercial in a local pub with some friends because we were waiting for the World Series game. For thirty minutes, I was amazed to see the bartender, along with some of the few people in the bar, stare transfixed at the television — and this was in a swing state where the polls are statistically tied. (Usually, everyone ignores political broadcasts in bars.) I did not know which candidate they supported, but they were definitely receptive to Obama’s broadcast. And that was the campaign’s goal all along.

The Sport of Artists

If anyone thinks that Game 5 of the World Series should have been completed in the rain, they should read this post by Keith Burgess-Jackson:

Football is meant to be played in inclement weather. Baseball is not. Football is a game of brute force, played by goons. Baseball is a game of finesse, played by artists. I felt sorry for the players yesterday.  They were soaking wet, cold, and suffering. While both teams played in the same conditions, neither should have had to.

Baseball is a beautiful game of precise angles of hits, solid cracks of the bat, graceful slides into bases, and clean bounces on natural grass. Rain interferes with the finesse and effectiveness of these moves. Grittiness and sloppiness are best left to football.

The World Series

BELLEVILLE, Illinois — Although the Tampa Bay Rays defeated my beloved Boston Red Sox, I will be rooting for them in the World Series, which begins tonight. (Since I live in Israel now, it has been a pleasure to watch baseball in prime-time while I’m on vacation here.) The Rays played a superb ALCS series, they are a classy team, and I admire their coach, who seems to be quite the Renaissance Man.

When I decide which baseball team to support, here is my hierarchy:

• Boston Red Sox (of course)
• New York Mets (my little brother’s favorite team and the other mortal enemy of the Team Who Must Not Be Named)
• St. Louis Cardinals (I grew up here)
• Any team playing against a non-Red Sox team in the AL East
• The American League team (as long as it is not You Know Who)
• The National League team
• The Evil Empire

I have yet to see a game where my list does not work. How do you decide who to support?

Wait Until Next Year

BELLEVILLE, Illinois — At this time last year, I watched the Boston Red Sox win the 2007 World Series while I was not in Massachusetts because I was visiting family. Now, last night, I watched the team lose the 2008 ALCS while on a visit from Israel to see my family here again.

What a difference a year in Red Sox Nation makes.

Explaining Baseball

RISHON LEZION, Israel — I do not remember ever learning the rules of baseball. I don’t think any American child ever does. Perhaps we merely absorbed the sport through cultural osmosis and watching it on television. So imagine trying to explain a sport that is fairly complex — at least as compared to soccer — to someone who knows nothing about it.

As I have been watching the baseball playoffs — Go Red Sox! — on television at a local pub here, a few Israelis usually try to watch it as well. (After roughly three minutes, they always say “it’s boring” and then walk away.) Last night, I found myself explaining the strike zone, a walk, the fact that a foul ball is not a third strike, the distance between bases in meters rather than feet, how baseball is more of a subtle art than a sport, and how a batter with a .500 batting average would be hailed as a superstar even though he fails half of the time. I just started sputtering random facts and rules.

I was reminded of the underrated movie “Blast from the Past” (the trailer is above) in which an early 1960s family raises their son in an underground fallout shelter after wrongly thinking that the United States was about to be nuked. The boy (Brendan Fraser) grows up and then goes out into Los Angeles in 1999 without ever having been above ground before. It’s much more witty and endearing than one might think.

There is an amusing scene in which the boy’s father starts to teach him the rules of baseball while they are underground. In the words of Roger Ebert’s review of the film, “try it sometime.” Well, I have tried it — and you don’t even know where to begin.

To Play or Not to Play

Here is an interesting article on what happens when baseball and religion conflict.

I Love October

Here is an interesting backgrounder on the baseball playoffs. (Go Red Sox!)

Stick a Fork in the Yankees

They are done.

The American League playoffs will be Los Angeles vs. Boston (wild card) and Tampa Bay vs. Chicago or Minnesota. Of course, the Red Sox will take it all, especially after Josh Beckett returns to his old self.

Football Season Starts

RISHON LEZION, Israel — Since I’m new here, I don’t know which Israeli Premier League football (soccer) team to support. Any suggestions? I’ll consider anyone except Beitar Jerusalem, whom I hate almost as much as the New York Yankees. Is there a team that is comparable to the Boston Red Sox?

Update: After talking to an Israeli friend, I’ve learned the following: Maccabi Tel Aviv is like the New York Yankees; Beitar Jerusalem is full of arsim, right-wingers, and hooligans; and Hapoel Tel Aviv is the team for leftists and socialists. I just can’t win.

Let Kids Be Kids

Teenagers build an innocent wiffleball field, and some adults get upset:

After three weeks of clearing brush and poison ivy, scrounging up plywood and green paint, digging holes and pouring concrete, Vincent, Justin and about a dozen friends did manage to build it — a tree-shaded Wiffle ball version of Fenway Park complete with a 12-foot-tall green monster in center field, American flag by the left-field foul pole and colorful signs for Taco Bell Frutista Freezes.

But, alas, they had no idea just who would come — youthful Wiffle ball players, yes, but also angry neighbors and their lawyer, the police, the town nuisance officer and tree warden and other officials in all shapes and sizes. It turns out that one kid’s field of dreams is an adult’s dangerous nuisance, liability nightmare, inappropriate usurpation of green space, unpermitted special use or drag on property values, and their Wiffle-ball Fenway has become the talk of Greenwich and a suburban Rorschach test about youthful summers past and present.

At a time when more elementary schools are banning tag, soccer, dodgeball, and touch football, it seems that we are increasingly unwiling to let children be children. As a local newspaper editorialized on the wiffleball issue:

“Back before we lost our collective minds and began shrieking with horror at the thought of kids having fun on their own (as in not part of an official league or otherwise organized activity), they used to do things like find a vacant field, turn it into a makeshift diamond and spend glorious hours in the summer sun,” the local newspaper, Greenwich Time, wrote in an editorial in support of the youths on Wednesday.

I wish I understood the cause. Perhaps it is the fact that nearly all educators in America today are women, who are generally more prone to ban physical or violent activity, even if it is a necessary part of growing up (especially for boys). Perhaps it is America’s litigious legal system in which people can win millions of dollars for being stupid or being in an accident that was nobody’s fault. Perhaps the Baby Boomer adults in the wiffleball example have become increasingly selfish and care more about their peace and quiet than about the ability of children to have some innocent fun. I’m sure there are many culprits.

Baseball is Better

In honor of the upcoming All-Star Game, I present you with the reasons that baseball is better than football.

Good Night, Funnyman

George Carlin was a master at observing human nature, noticing the subtleties of language, and criticizing innane actions of governments and religions as he saw fit. While I disagreed with some of his points, his death is a great loss for comedy, as well as American society in general. Here are some of his most famous routines. HBO is also showing every one of Carlin’s specials over the next two days.

Religion is Bullshit

The Seven Dirty Words

Baseball and Football

On Soft Language

This Country is Finished

The Politics of Football

TEL AVIV — If you think the rivalry between the Boston Red Sox and the New York Yankees is intense, you should watch international football (soccer) sometime. This sport can be war by other means.

I’ve started watching my first European 2008 Football Championship here in Israel, but I’m not sure who I will support. My two favorite national teams, Israel and England, did not make it through the preliminary competition (thank you, Russia), so I’ve been asking Israelis who they support. Their answers have been intriguing.

Most Israelis support the Netherlands because that country helped to save Jews during the Holocaust, and it is a strong supporter of Israel today. Everyone hates France because the French people are seen as increasingly anti-Semitic and anti-Israel. For obvious reasons, the only Israelis who will support Germany are those whose families originally come from there. People generally support the countries from where their families come — a friend of mine is completely supporting Poland, and I empathize because my mother’s family is originally from there. However, some Israelis claim to prefer certain teams specifically because of their particular success and style while they play the game.

Last night, while at a bar, everyone supported the Czech Republic against Switzerland. I have no idea why. But in the second game, everyone supported Portugal against Turkey. People insisted that it was because Portugal is a class-A team that’s on the same level as France and Italy, but I cannot help but wonder if it was also because Turkey is a Muslim country. I asked a bartender if Turkey likes Israel (after all, their governments are extremely friendly), and she simply said, “Not really.” When the Czech Republic won, the whole bar erupted into cheers.

Tonight, everyone is looking forward to Germany vs. Poland – talk about World War II nostalgia (or, perhaps, bitter memories). Only one person I know is supporting Germany. It will be interesting to see if anyone else in the crowd does.

Manny Being Manny

RISHON LEZION, Israel — I wish I had seen this live.

Cursing the Yankees

This is awesome. It’s too bad that the jersey was found before Opening Day at the new Yankee Stadium.

Red Sox Season Starts

JERUSALEM — The baseball season will officially begin in ten minutes, when the Boston Red Sox host the Detroit Tigers at Opening Day at Fenway Park. Since the game is not being shown on ESPN or Fox Sports, I can only listen to it through the website of Major League Baseball/WRKO radio in Boston. (Click here or here if you want to listen as well.)

But I’m really looking forward to this weekend, which will have the first Yankees-Red Sox series in Boston. I’ll be watching from a bar here in the Holy City. Go Sox! Yankees suck!

The Super Bowl

JERUSALEM — So I’m sitting in a living room in the Holy City, watching the Super Bowl with three other Americans and one Canadian. Since I lived in Boston for nine years, I’m rooting for the New England Patriots.

It feels weird because I did not watch the NFL playoffs, so I cannot make any predictions based on the Patriots’ postseason performance. I moved away from the United States shortly after watching the Patriots defeat the New York Giants 38-35 in the last regular-season game.

The two teams, of course, are facing each other again tonight. (Or, for me, this morning.) The Patriots are favored by 12.5 points, but I would have given them 14. (Just because I’m that biased.) I’ll be sad not to be able to attend the victory parade.

At least I will have this to keep me going: It is two months and four days until Red Sox Opening Day at Fenway Park. I’ll probably be watching from Mike’s Place.